I Only Date Chinese

Do you only date Chinese people? Are you a Chinese-ist? gasp!

Then you’ll probably want to attend Third Thursday’s upcoming discussion, “I only date Chinese“, on February 15th (this week!) in San Francisco. (Apologies to all those not in San Francisco… which is probably most of you…)

Third Thursdays is a “monthly dinner series for people in the nonprofit, for-profit, and government sectors interested in Asian American & Pacific Islander (AA&PI) community issues and service opportunities.” They are an all-volunteer organization that meets, well, every third Thursday of each month in San Francisco or Berkeley. Eight Asian Americans, from both non-profit and for-profit backgrounds, started this in the spring of 2000, and it’s been a way for people to stay active and socialize within the AA&PI community. (Disclaimer: A friend of mine is one of their organizers.)

What they’re going to discuss in this event:

If you say you only date Chinese, you might be going for the largest pool, trying to appease your parents, or just a bit narrow-minded.

This month, we look at what’s often considered the next most acceptable option, inter-ethnic Asian relationships. We’ll talk about why, what, and leave out most of the how. Join us for some perspective.

They have two panelists: Wei Ming Dariotis, Assistant Professor of Asian American Studies at SFSU, andFrederick Y. Huang, M.D., a psychotherapist & general adult psychiatrist. The dinner is free, though donations are welcomed.

Okay, enough of the pitch. Do *I* only date Chinese, you ask?

Nah. I’m an EOD: Equal Opportunity Dater.

I have friends who are less diverse in their preferences though. One Taiwanese friend only dates Taiwanese guys. Or – to be honest – Asian Americans. It’s her parents who want her to only date Taiwanese. So she tends to seek out Taiwanese too. And, I suspect, that’s the case with many Asian Americans (and Asian Canadians, of course, sorry Christine, didn’t mean to forget you). Parental pressures can be tough.

But then there’s the friend who does only date Chinese. In her opinion, she wants a guy who can speak the same language (Chinglish), so she can teach her kids Chinese and English. It’s not about parental pressures for her, it’s about fostering a common sense of identity for her children – that identity being Chinese American.

Is that being narrow-minded? Or culturally sensitive? Or just realistic?

And how about you? Who do you date?