Seriously, I want to know: Chen Qigang, the music director for the fantabulous opening ceremony for the Beijing Olympics has admitted that the young, oh-so-cute girl singing China’s national anthem was actually just lip-syncing. The real singer? Not the pig-tailed Lin Miaoke, but a seven year old Yang Peiyi who was unfortunate enough to have “a chubby face and uneven teeth” at such a precarious age.
But why? I mean, c’mon; we’re Asian. We’re literally born with fat cheeks and if you’re not American (or Canadian), you’re SUPPOSED to have crooked teeth. Right? I would know. I have Japanese family members. I had braces. They did not.
“The reason was for the national interest. The child on camera should be flawless in image, internal feelings, and expression,” said Chen, a renowned contemporary composer and French citizen.
“Lin Miaoke is excellent in those aspects. But in terms of voice, Yang Peiyi is perfect, each member of our team agreed,” he said.
Dang, yo. That probably has to be the most eloquent way to say that you’re not pretty enough for the global community, even for a 7 year old. I wonder if Chen practiced that response in front of the mirror, or maybe it’s filed away in some Chinese etiquette handbook on how to turn someone down. It’s better than the whole “it’s not you, it’s us” excuse. Cause in this case, it really IS you. All I have to say, though, is that’s way harsh, Tai.
But you want to know what’s worse? It wasn’t even Chen’s fault!
He said the final decision to stage the event with Lin lip-synching to another girl’s voice was taken after a senior member of China’s ruling Communist Party politburo attended a rehearsal.
Whaaaaaaaaat? Who’s this senior member? This is ridiculous! Someone find out who this guy is and pull up his Facebook profile because I will bet you a week’s salary that this “senior member” is NOT all that. And a bag of chips. Just kidding. About the chips. Who says that anymore?